76.6kgs

Well I didn't make it to my goal of 75kgs by this weigh in.   I am sure if I weigh in tomorrow I will be there. I sort of lost my way this week after having being on a high, for having  a good size weight drop last week.

There seems to be a repeating pattern of "Something" I keep doing every weekend/start of the week.  I am not sure if being a little slack with my food on the weekend or doing increased exercise Sun-Tuesday shows a higher weigh in on Wednesdays compared to me weighing in on Thursdays.  Who knows!

Never mind because really at the end of the day, I am dropping down in weight not going up and my lifestyle has certainly changed.  I am feeling muscles and even bones now that I haven't felt for such a long time.  While I still have loads of jiggly bits there seems to be less padding.  I also figure if I do this at my pace rather than dropping huge numbers each week.  I am personally less likely to gain 5kgs in the minute I stop the program.

I found this week menu food not all that inspiring for me and with the school holidays - I didn't sit down and work out mine and my families meal plans for this week. Planning for me is the main thing.  If the food is there and I am hungry I will eat it.  If I haven't planned and I am hungry I will just grab food (not bad food) but the size of my meal and calories might push me over my daily calorie limit.  I wish that Michelle posted the weeks menu first thing on Thursday as I do our weekly food shopping mornings on Thursday.

I also had my sister 30th Birthday on Saturday and while I tried so hard not to blow out my calories for the day. At the same time it was hard because she had a "French themed" cocktail party with little nibbles, loads of beautiful french cheeses.  I was starving actually most of us was starving add a few glasses of Champers and I kind of lost count of my calories for the day. It was hard to make good food choices because there wasn't a lot to choice from.

I have also had very limited time to get to the gym and burn the calories up.  I have now completed two Cycle classes and just love it. But cry at the same time as its such a new challenge for my body but I love the end result. Gosh listen to me making excuses. (Insert slap to the head)..... Just stop it Felicity!

I am getting lots of people notice I have lost weight and I am finding it hard to accept the compliments because I was around this weight lost October. I need to break through the 75kgs to be able to really say this a new weight loss number on the scales for me.

With the School holidays being here - There are days when I want to go and hang out with my little man.  He went to the gym creche while I did a Circuit class the other day without any complaints.  Well except for him saying "Mum its 7am this is school wake up time".  When the alarm went off for us to get to gym by 9am.  From there we checked out the new Croydon Library and came home with 57 books.  Try carrying them when you have just done a work out.

Then we decided to have lunch at our local Cafe Barkley's.  I knew I could make reasonable healthy food choices here plus they make great coffee.   My little guy had the nachos and I had their yummy Eggs with spinach and salmon.  I think its called the Atlantic.  Anyway its usually smothered in Hollandaise sauce.  Being the new me - The good Felicity was saying just don't order it and the bad was "Oh you can burn it off at the gym".  So I asked for the sauce to be on the side.  I have never done that before and felt really in control.

So here is my yummy healthy after workout brunch.

I wish I could poach an egg like that - I have tried so many times.

This week has also seen me update my I.phone tunes.  I found out that alot of the Cardio tracks for the "Les Mills" classes are by a lady called "Venus Jones". Worth checking out on I.Tunes.

 I had a crappy night last night.  On my way to gym as I reversed out the drive way. Our new neighbour had parked his dark green car opposite our drive way. Where there is no street lighting.  We have a tricky drive way and being wet and raining plus his car being dark when I reversed out I could not see it due to the angle that I have to pull out of our drive.  Being in hubbies 4 day old work car that did not have reversing sensors I smashed into the side back door of my neighbours car and damaged the bumper of hubbies work car which has to be replaced. 

The thing is, I just rolled back while I put the car into 1st (Manual car) and it rolled/touched the other car in a soft spot of his door and it caved it in.

While of course I am happy that no one was hurt.  I am completely guttered as the excess on the car insurance  is $1500.00.   My tax return that is going into my bank account on Monday is $1500.  Not even 5 mins earlier I had said to hubby.  "Now before you go paying bills with that money on Monday - I want some new clothes".  We are also big time struggling with $'s due to work cut backs at hubbies work.  I really need to go back to work but that is another story!

So I was really angry and I am still really angry with myself.  I still went to gym even with red eyes. Every now and then I would remember what a stupid thing and waste of money I had just done and the tears would start flowing again.   I managed to burn off 900 and some angry at the time.  I was glad the new me still went to gym as the old me would have gone up to the super market grabbed a bottle of wine and some junk food and drowned my sorrows that way.  So I guess that was a positive thing!!!

Happy Dance!!!!! 76.6kgs

Today is officially not weigh in day that was yesterday (77.2kgs) as of the 29th June.

I have to be honest and say for some reason (insert long moaning voice), on  Wednesdays, I weigh heavier than any other day of the week.  I knew and felt like I was a lot lighter so,  I weighed myself again today and in my sleepy haze of 7am I cursed the scales for being screwed up.  Until I realised it said 76.6kgs not 77.6kgs.

I actually can not really remember a time I was 76kgs - I remember way back in 1999 I was around this weight and hated everything about myself.  It was around that time I started taking a prescription medication to lose weight (you know the one - some call it legal speed).  It was terrible terrible stuff and I could only last a few days and then would have to take a break and sleep for a few days straight.  The upside to taking it was that my house was clean because I was so "Pumped up" and had to be doing something but I couldn't sleep and I was dam snappy!  I am amazed that my then boyfriend wanted to marry me! Lucky he did in 2000.

So what else has been happening.

• I have reached all of my 1st month goals. 
• To lose 5kgs. 
•  Attempt my first cycle class. 
• Up my level of fitness.
•  To be able to row 2kms in under 10mins.

I can also add running to this list as I have now gone on to start running week 2.  Which is basically running for 1 1/2 mins walking for 2mins.  

I love love love cycle.  There it is out loud.  I went back to Pump last week and put my neck out but I still loved it and will be back next week.

I walked out of my first ever class as it was just not going to burn the calories and it was so not a circuit class.  It was like doing all style warm up exercises at a retirement home.  

I have had to pull out my old bra's etc that I had grown out of years ago and some are now too big........

I need to go shopping for new clothes.  I am still around a 14-16 a long way off 18/20 + that I used to be.

I have moments of "Man I look good!" to "Shit I am still fat and ugly!".  I was really surprised when I heard my innerself talking so badly to me.

I feel like the  Michelle Bridges program has finally "Clicked" this week.  While I have been chopping & changing some of the meals around its still working.

I know that my journey is going to be a lot slower than some of the other people on the challenge.  That's OK.  I need to live a little and eat some cake when its my Birthday without feeling guilty that " I must eat light" for the rest of the week, while beating my head against the wall.   I know now, that I need to just move on to the next day.

I am certainly a lot fitter but I know there is still a long way to go there.  I am still struggling with pain but with the help of the Osteopath I am seeing we have the pain under control.

My goal this week is to be in the 75kgs - Far out!!!! 

I think I had stalled my weight loss because I was basically loosing the weight that I had already lost last year and couldn't see beyond that.  Hope that makes sense.  So now that I am in my new weight loss numbers I finally feel like I am now working towards my new goal.

Challenges coming up school holidays, snacking and lack of "Me" exercise time.  What time I do get at the gym will have to be used burning up calories - Because my puppy needs to be walked most nights I have to share my evenings with her and let hubby and puppy go for walkies.  I hope that maybe I can get a few days in walking her during the day with my son so that I can go to gym at night.

You will need to tilt your head to the side for this one as the photo is the wrong way up!

This is my latest fav meal.  Its from Michelle Bridges cookbook its Tuna mornay and I just love it.  Simple easy and very filling.  I don't bother having it with rice anymore.  I just use Iceberg lettuce to wrap it up in.

Well must head to bed - I have a boot camp style circuit class in the morning that I want to get to in time for.

Living every day a better version of Myself!

This is the mantra of Michelle's live video this week.  It's about not comparing ourselves to others. It's about eating well, exercising and being the best you can be every day.  No make lame excuses about why your going to eat bad or not exercise.

I think I pretty much do that every day already.  I just need my body to get up and be the best that my brain thinks it can be.

I have had a very busy weekend.  Hubby has been working or out for most of the weekend, so I didn't hit the gym.  I took my puppy for an hour walk today, not really a big calorie burner but 300 cals is better than sitting on my butt.  Plus she just adores getting out and about.

Today I thought I would post about some I.phone Apps that I have downloaded that I have been using to mix up my sessions at gym and also start running.

The first one is called "Get running couch to 5km". It is by BenJohn Barnes.  I think it was around $2.
It was one of the very few beginning to  run apps that was in Kms not miles.  It is really really easy to use.

What I love:  There is a lovely ladies voice.  She only chats to me when its time to start running or its 30secs to walking.  I love that it works with my own I.pod music.   I think its def a great one to have.

I can't find anything that I dislike about it this app. It's easy to use. The first week is walk for 1 1/2 mins and then running for one minute.  It automatically updates when you complete your run and tells you when you will need to run again.  If you miss that day.  Its all good.  It resets the next day for you.

The other App that I am liking this week.  Is Spin Campanion by Mathieu Rothier again this app was around $2.  I think there was a free older version but I thought I would try this one out .

This one was a bit more fancy.  I think its a good all rounder cardio app.  It could easily be used for Spin, treadmill, Xtrainer - Indoor and out door activities.

There are a few things you need to set up at the start like where or which file you want to use to get the music from.  Ok this is tricky to explain.   Depending on the heart rate or speed the app is going at, it will chose from your music file the right song to go with the workout.  Very very funky.  That is why I think this is a great overall app.

What I didn't like was a bell like sound when it was time to amp up your workout. Only a small thing.

I like using this app when I am on the Xtrainer.  I love how it selects the right songs and it helps to push you a little bit harder during your work out.

The last one (or middle) one in the photo - Is a sleep sound app.  I haven't tried it to be honest it drove me nuts in the 30secs I was listening to it.  I think it was free.

I am hoping to spend some more time searching I.phone apps for training this week.

Hope these might come in handy for anyone reading my little Ole blog!

A life changing moment week and I'm finally down to 78.4kgs

This week has been some what emotional week for me.  I get very down when my back and hip are letting me down and I am in constant pain.  I am not a very uplifting person to be around. Even the dog struggles to give me attention!

It stops me from being focused and being able to gym properly.  Its like having square wheels on a car.

However, something happened last Saturday night that I wasn't going to post about but now a week later, I realise that I need to share it because what "nearly" happened was life changing and I felt I didn't get the support from my husband. (I will go into that later).

Last Saturday night driving home from my girls night out at Crown.  I was in the centre lane driving down the Eastern Freeway heading outbound back home.  As I was driving along in hubbies car.  I could see a head of me a red car parked in the center of an upcoming bridge.  It is Belford Road bridge its a quiet bridge that is used to get to the Kew golf club.  Anyway, I remember thinking.  Why are the cars banked up on the bridge.

As I got closer I saw that was nearly my life rushing ahead of me.

I man came to the bridge wearing a grey hooding covering his head and he had a huge rock in his hand and lent over the bridge aimed at me in the centre lane.   I can't remember at that very point what I said. I know it wasn't clean enough for me to post here. (Even writing this my heart is racing at a million miles and feel teary).

I do remember thinking selfish prick and F@#k he is going to throw that at me.  I can still remember seeing the image of his face looking at me!

I knew there was a car to my right - I had no idea what was to my left but I just swerved into the left lane.  I remember seeing the car to the right also swerve to the emergency lane.

I felt sick and angry when I got to the other side and realised what just could have happened.

Being in hubbies car I had hands free phone and called the Police.   I got the man from Emergency services and I doubt anything could be done but he took my details.  Some of the questions were just stupid like did you see the rock, was he drunk or drug effected?  I was like "Buddy I didn't want to stick around to see if he threw it or what it was but he was aiming at me and looking down at me".

I came home and was ready to burst into tears.  Hoping my husband would lend me a shoulder but alas like every other moment in my life.  I was let down.  He was more interested in getting my I.phone problem sorted out.   He just didn't get it!

Then I got angry with hubby.  I felt that he had no concept of the fact someone just could have killed me and my phone is the last thing to worry about.  I guess to men - I am OK and the phone isnt.  Maybe that's the side of the family my son gets his Autism from.  Who knows.

I haven't been able to sleep all week without seeing at some stage a man wearing a grey hoodie over his face. I have had huge horrific car accident "death" type dreams all week.

Most of the week I have struggled with emotional eating and I know see why.  I am doing this journey on my own.  I know I don't get the support at home and I sometimes feel like the 3 of us are living under the same roof but traveling separately.   Something to work on I guess.

So I am sorry this post is a bit of a downer but I needed to get it off my chest and being my blog I guess this is the best place.  I realise why I emotionally eat.  Especially after last weekend.

Selfish prick!

The sooooo loooong weekend.

My little boy had a "Pupil free day" from school on Friday.  Add that to a 3 day long weekend and then on Tuesday he had another day off due to a hospital appointment.  I feel like my whole week has been all over the place.

I will be honest and say straight up that I am struggling this week.  I need to get my act together.
I feel lost due to my hip playing up and not being able to push myself. Hell! I can't even sit on a freaking bike and peddle at the moment.

I saw the replacement chiro last Thursday and while he was good he simply didn't know how to adjust my hip. My lovely Chiropractor actually pulls at my hip and we do some exercises to release the pressure off the nerve. This guy just used a gun thing and I feel like nothing has been done.

I feel defeated and I haven't been to gym since a poor workout that I did on Saturday.

I am also finding it hard to burn 500 calories at the gym.  I can normally smash 900 easy but since dropping to a lower weight. I adjusted my heart monitor and now I have to work even freaking harder......... I know I should be happy.

I have had birthdays, lunches and special dinners this week.  Look! I know that is life and maybe I should have planned it a bit better but I didn't and now all I can do is hope that tomorrow the scales are the same or lower and JFDI as Michelle would say!............

I have hit a curve ball

Man ......Where have the days and weeks gone.

I am still here.  Some days I am so busy burning calories at gym that it leaves me rushing around to do my every day stuff and falling asleep in a heap at the end of the day.  So no blogging.  Naughty me.

This week has seen me take on so many new classes at gym as well at Boxing session with Matt at the Yarra Road Primary school in Croydon.  I this week I have started the couch to 25km run.  I downloaded a fantastic App to my I.phone called, "Get Running".  It was the only one that I found to be in Kms rather than miles. You listen to your own music but a lady counts down your warm up time and then tells you when to run.  Its amazing and I can't believe how much calories get burnt up from running.  Fingers crossed my body keeps being kind to me.

Also this week I added two Circuit classes to my training which really amp'd things up.

You would think this week that my weight would have just melted away. Aggh sadly no my weight has gone up.  Will have to wait and see how things go on Wednesdays weigh in.  I know my belly feels flatter and I'm feeling more toned.   I just wish the scales would move.

I bought a running magazine.  I was attracted to the front cover (as per photo) of the lady with one leg.
I figure if she can run with 1.2 legs then I can get my fat butt running with two good legs.  Lots of motivating reading in there and all of the upcoming fun runs etc.

And I will leave you with tonights dinner.  Super easy chicken with a teaspoon of Kecap Manus rubbed all over. Then you slice up a granny smith apple, (however, I would use a pink lady next time). Take the chicken out when cooked leave to rest and throw the apples in to carmel in the sauce.  Serve with greens and mashed sweet potato that is mashed with no butter or milk.

78.6kgs

I am totally amazed to see these numbers on the scales.

This program is really getting me motivated and I have even been trying new classes at gym.

So far my body has held up and although I have plenty of aches. My hip is hanging in there for me. (touch wood).

I have enjoyed most of the food and some not so much.  I could have probably lost more weight if I had followed each day menu without changing things. For example I had the steak with salsa two nights in a row because basically thats what I had in the fridge.  I really need to be more organised and wonder how people are coping, that work and have children/families to look after as well.

Today is sort of the "last chance" workout. I was pumped to get to gym because I have started the "couch to 25km run" program, that I downloaded the app to my I.phone it is fantastic.

However, My son was home sick today and instead of beating myself up about it I put on Michelle's "Crunch time" DVD.  Sadly it only burnt up 250cals.  Not huge numbers the day before weigh in.

If I think back that only a little over a week a go and on the Sunday (22nd May) I think it is. I weighed 82.4kgs.  Today, 78.6kgs, So that is a loss of 3.8kgs in a little over a week.  I haven't so far craved for anything as long as I don't let my self get hungry from not being prepared.  It helps that my body hasn't caved in yet.