Monday, December 6, 2010

Its begining to look a lot like Christmas.

And the way I have been eating lately I might just pass as a Christmas tree, if you hang some decorations on me and twirl around some flashing lights.

I am currently day 5 post operation and had my stitches out today.  Boy was that fun Not!

All is good and I have healthy insides apparently.  Fantastic, now lets work on the rest of me.

So you see.  With having 3 weekends in a row of eating, before going on my holiday.  Add my holiday which I must say, I think I actually did pretty well.  Came home tried to get back on the "exercise wagon". My body decided to pack up shop for the holidays, add a period, nervousness about having an operation, having that operation and now coming out the other side 5 days later.  I am a grand total of hmmm 78.? something kilos.

I swear, I am an eating, food tasting, food shoveling, food sneaking person again.  I know I shouldn't be tasting all of my sons dinner of a night time, when I am getting it ready for him. Especially when my own healthy dinner (or in some cases not so healthy) dinner is only an hour or so away. Even as I put it in my mouth and even eating bits of fat from the meat that I would never ever eat (that's why I am taking it off my sons plate).  Its like I have become a comatose zombie rubbish bin.

I have the naughty Felicity making decisions for me at the moment.  I know that when I am hungry, I could go and have a yogurt or maybe some tuna and salad.  But no,  I have found myself grabbing a packet of rice chips, a cookie,  3 or 4 creamy sushi instead of my usual 2 pieces of non creamy type sushi.  Sure rice chips are a much healthier option than say "Corn Chips". Haha I can't stop laughing, even while I am typing this post out.  Sure they have say 400cals per box compared to CC at 1200 per bag but I don't need to hoover the whole box down.

 I swear the food is speaking to me and demanding that I aimlessly stuff it in my mouth.  The calories don't count.  I have even heard myself say - Now wait for it "It doesn't matter - I will work it off at the gym or I need cheering up".   I actually don't think I am even in tune with my hunger and just allowing "stuff" into my mouth.  I am not sure when I remember getting hunger pains.  Oh actually I do. Each time I tried to really push myself at gym when I came back from holidays.  My stomach would suddenly go on strike and scream "I am hungry now get off that bike and feed me".

So I am battling with my demons.  Being totally naughty as I am bored, need to get to gym, get my routine happening with good eating again.  I am totally out of whack at the moment.

I can't even get myself motivated to get motivated.  I am struggling with "taking it easy" and I should be using this time to catch up on some reading, menu planning etc.  I can't even get to the shops to buy healthy food.  Although, today I do feel the best that I have felt for a few days.

The Doctor said last week that I should be able to start "light" exercise after the stitches are out.  There is no way I am going to be able to hit the gym still for a while. I feel like if I bend over my belly button is going to burst open.

So today I started off good - I have had my usual cereal for breakfast (I couldn't stomach it until today). I have had a coffee and some sushi,  I had a WW frozen meal for lunch which meant I was starving by 4pm.

Then everything started to go down hill soon after 4pm.  Taste tested my sons dinner, the rice chips some how ended up in front of me (OK I have no yogurt or fruit). Dinner is going to be chicken stir fry without rice!

And probably a little mini almond magnum  - They only have 150 calories (right!)

Tomorrow challenge is acknowledging my food triggers and eating.  Trying to stick to around 1300 cals and writing everything down.

Should have some happy snaps tomorrow as well.

Agghhhh I need to exercise!!!!!!

1 comment:

  1. Glad to hear you are OK !!!! I hope you get back into kicking some goals when you are feeling better. I am sure that Anathestic is a real kill-joy and it takes a while to feel yourself again!!