Dear Bathroom scales,
I have put up with your miscalculations of my weight for far too long.
When I purchased you, for the expensive sum of $100.00 (yes that's right!) It was 10 years ago and now I can purchase a much more slim line, super seeded model for 1/4 of the price and I am sure they will do a much better job.
How dare you tell me this morning that I weigh 82.4, 81.8, 85.6kgs. It is your job, to tell me the correct weight. Don't you realise, by telling me 3 different amounts and being way off centre, that it sets my day up for destruction and possibly failure?
I am giving you this letter as I will no longer be requiring your services anymore from this Friday when a nice new slimline model, will be taking over your space on the bathroom floor.